Late one night, Andrea, Grace, Asia and I had a long discussion about decisions we make in life, and whether or not fate exists. After about 4 hours of heated debate, Asia and I had convinced the girls that there is no such thing as fate, and that up to that point, they had been making their decisions passively and not actively.

Asia and I argued that fate only exists with people who refuse to take control of their decisions. It’s like an excuse that passive individuals make to themselves; they believe fate will make decisions for them. We reasoned that fate could not exist because at any given moment, we could change fate by making a different decision, therefore changing fate. I believe that some sort of fate or destiny does exist; but for an event to be called fate, it would have to go through severe obstacles and still take place. For example, if a guy breaks up with a girl, moves to a different country, loses touch with her, and then suddenly runs into her on the street, hitting it off, and eventually getting married, that might be considered fate, meaning it was meant to happen no matter what.

Andrea and Grace stated that the way they make decisions was based on the options given to them; they believed that decisions and choices were always somehow made for them, and things always work themselves out no matter what. Asia and I thought that this was a grossly passive way of living your life- they of course have made decisions before, but not actively pursuing their outcomes.

A topic that came up repeatedly was relationships, and how both girls hadn’t really taken control of their past relationships. Asia and I stated that we always were in total control of our relationships, and that our ex-girlfriends had always been our down-ass bitches. (Haha just kidding.) In fact, none of us had ever really been in total control of a relationship- and rightly so, because that’s how relationships are supposed to be. You’re always more vulnerable in the decision-making process when someone else is involved. But Asia and I argued that sometimes the girls had left themselves completely vulnerable by letting the guy make the ultimate decision, when they just as easily could have made an opposite decision that would have saved them a lot of heartache.

Ultimately, the way someone makes their decisions is up to them. But I believe there are two ways to make decisions in life, one is actively, and the other is passively. When you make decisions passively, eventually they will be made for you, and more often than not, that person isn’t going to be happy with the decision that was made for them. I have learned that even when I make bad decisions for myself, I feel much better about myself because I made that decision uninhibited. And that’s what its all about.